70-year-old widow posts newspaper advert looking for new husband, only for it to go viral

Getting back into the dating world can be strange, and intimidating, especially if it’s been a long time since you were last single. Of course, the most important lesson to remember is that it’s crucial you stay open to others and don’t judge anyone too quickly.

It was with that in mind that I decided to share a funny story I recently came across online. It involves a 70-year-old widow, a newspaper advert, and a search for a new husband.
She was at home one day when her doorbell suddenly rang … only, she couldn’t possibly have predicted who would be on the other side.

Read the full hilarious joke below — and make sure you stick with it until the punchline.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again…

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”
Why not help cheer a friend up? Share this joke and help give someone a good laugh!

Related Posts

5 warning signs of cancer developing in your body

Our body often gives warning signs when something’s wrong—especially with serious illnesses like cancer. “Paying attention to these signs, that are often subtle, can lead to early…

Everything We Know About the Air India Flight 171 Crash: Pilot’s Final Words, Story of the Only Survivor, & More

**Air India Flight 171 Crash: What Happened** On June 12, 2025, Air India Flight AI171, a Boeing 787-8 bound for London, crashed minutes after taking off from…

Experts Say 3 Major U.S. Regions Face Risk of Tsunamis and Flooding

Scientists have identified three major tsunami risk zones in the U.S.: the **Pacific Northwest**, **East Coast**, and **Gulf Coast**. These are not distant dangers—millions live directly in…

11 Signs Your Body Is Giving You Important Alerts

Our bodies often send subtle warnings. While not all are serious, it’s best to “be safe than sorry” and talk to a doctor if you’re concerned. **1….

Say goodbye to joint pain and foot pain with a relaxing rosemary bath

This simple homemade mix combines **raw honey, cinnamon, turmeric, apple cider vinegar, and chia seeds**—all known for their powerful health benefits. Turmeric and chia seeds may reduce…

Plane seat that sole survivor of Air India crash sat on appears to be very hard to book now

A tragic Air India crash occurred on June 12, when a Boeing 787-8 Dreamliner departing from Ahmedabad to London’s Gatwick Airport crashed into a doctors’ hostel just…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *